Getting Nervous and Happy Valentine's Day!!

As my big day get closer, I am starting to get nervous!!!

I know God is going to watch over me and Baby K, but when the doctor goes over all the "what if's and could be's" it has gotten to me.  I am sure nerves are apart of all this, but I was cool at one point.  I am trying not to get too worked up,  because I know that will not help at all.

Even through the nerves I am still very excited to see my little girls face and hear her cries.  I wonder every day what I am going to do when I hear that precious cry. I am so giddy!

Still working to get the house in tip top shape and doing all the things I do not want to have to think about later, so I have been busy on my swollen (sausage looking) feet.. LOL. The joys of motherhood. 

Well 2 ish days to go and I can see my Princess!

To  Baby K:  We will meet on Friday and you cannot believe how excited me and your family are to see you.  I know I have said this so many times in these blogs, but you are so loved! Everyone is having their own personal countdowns waiting on your arrival. Today is Valentine's Day, remember to give the love that you receive and sometimes the love you think you should be receiving, it may sometimes get hard but it will surely pay off!  A lot of times life will not be fair, but never let that change who you are and what you are to those whom you love.  No one is perfect, so even those whom say they love you the most may hurt your feelings, but speak up but do not hold a grudge.  Love freely!

She is coming!!!

Life has been interesting and fun all at the same time. 

I  had the very best baby shower ever! I also had a surprise one at work! I have felt so much love for me and Baby K. Everyone has been so supportive. My baby shower was awesome, of course there is always one that causes drama and has to be the center of attention.  But even through that I was still super happy, giddy and emotional the entire day!

I have started the swelling really bad in my feet when I am working too hard. The body has a way of telling you to slow down. I am still going to the doc twice a week, which is not too bad.  I enjoy the fact that I get to hear her heart beating so often.  We did have one scare, she was not very responsive one day and I had to have some additional testing.  Me and my family were really nervous, but she was a'ok.  I have had a few braxton hicks contractions, but nothing too bad.  I think all the excitement of family and friends sent my body through a tail spin.

I had a growth ultrasound on the 3rd and she is still growing nicely.  She is measuring 6lbs 2ozs.  I am so happy she is healthy.  I hope I am not the only mom to be, that even at 38 weeks still worries that she will be alright. I still have minimal fears that something could happen to her.  I feel so bad for thinking it, because this has been such a blessed pregnancy.  So I ask for forgiveness and try to shake off the bad feelings.

Soooooo turns out I have to have a c-section. My cervix is really high.  I knew that because my insemination was very painful and took a long time because they had to get to my very high cervix. I never thought it would effect labor and delivery.  Well the cervix is high and the pelvic is small. And will make the descending process hard.  So, I am having a c-section on Friday, Feb 17th.  I am very excited and surprisingly not nervous, YET! I have never been hospitalized so I have no idea what to expect with IV, the stay, and such.  I am excited to know she is coming.  I can't  wait to meet her and see her face!

I stopped working  yesterday, which was a little bittersweet.  I am actually going to miss those folks :-). But I am glad to have the next week to mentally and physically prepare as much as possible to "officially" be a Mommy! This is my last weekend as a non parent, very surreal feeling.  But I am so ready for my little girl.  I am very scared of how well I will do with her and if she is a cranky baby. I know I will have a lot of support, but she is my responsibility and that is very surreal. Bottom line.... Ready or not here she comes!!! Stay tuned and please send up prayers for a safe delivery!  Thank you all!

Nursery and Belly!

Ok.. This is for you Shannon :-)

Some Pics of the nursery and me, Baby K, and Chico!



Chico loves laying in the floor in here.. LOL



WOWWWW... my belly is HUGE!

Getting CLOSER! 34 Weeks!

I have been completely missing in action.  I am so enjoying my pregnancy, and keeping busy getting ready for my little girl.  I find it hard to do much of anything else, besides work, sleep, nursery, and enjoying my last few weeks of pregnancy. I have been busy, touring hospital, picking pediatrician, and at the doc twice a week.  So not much time for much else.

I love going in her nursery, it is not completely done, but it makes my heart warm when I walk in there. I took maternity pictures yesterday and they were so nice.  I cried like a baby when I looked over them all.  I am so grateful to be in this position that it is overwhelming.

I am starting to get very nervous about labor and delivery. I have no idea what to expect for me.  I have never had an IV, never stayed in the hospital, none of that. So all the unknowns have me going a little stir crazy.  Everyone says do not worry, but they are not the one that has to get this baby out... LOL. I know this is probably crazy, but I think I want a c-section.  I know it is surgery, but I have to be induced anyway, so what live through patocin if I don't have to. I am being induced a week early, don't know the date yet, because of my history of hypertension. Although my blood pressure has been fabulous this entire pregnancy.  I think because of my weight issues and history of high blood pressure, everyone thought i would have a hard pregnancy, but it has been seamless.  No issues thus far and I am almost there.  I know anything can happen at this point, but I am so happy with how things have been.

My little girl is so active, I have to go to the doctor twice a week for fetal non-stress test and she is always moving all around like she knows they need to hear her heart.  Her movements make me smile, so I have no problem with it, however, it took 2 nurses to get her heartbeat the first time I went :-). Man I am so in love with this baby girl. 

My baby shower is on the 28th and I am very happy I get to see everyone.  But it has been one big deal to get everything together.  Even though I am not "planning" I am involved and I will be glad when it is over.

I do miss blogging, but I tell you my life right now is so full it falls to the bottom.  Please forgive me. I am so happy for the others, who blogs I follow, that are having their little ones soon.  I wish them many blessings and well wishes of a smooth delivery.

I have a friend MW, I mentioned last time I posted, well she is taking the plunge for real. I am completely excited for her.  She so deserves this happiness.  She has selected her donor and is about to get into full swing.  We used the same sperm bank, so she said we are "sperm bank sisters".  How cute is that?

I tell you once you take life by the horns it can surely be an awesome adventure.  And I am loving every minute of it!!!

It Really Can Be OKAY!!

Within the last month I have had some ups and downs, but all in all it has been truly blessed! Things can really be OKAY, which does amaze me some days. But so happy it is all okay.

I had to repeat my gestational diabetes test, it was slightly elevated so I was scared. Only by 8 points, but the doctors wanted to be sure everything was ok.  I had to do the 3 hour test glucose test and it all came back perfect!!! Thank you Jesus! I started to think, Man it can't all be perfect, but I guess it can be close.  I must admit this pregnancy had been as smooth as I think pregnancy can be. WHEW!!!!

I just got back from my last Vacay before my little one is born and had a great time.  I wanted to get away from reality for a few days, because I know once K comes she is going to need all my time and traveling will be scarce.  Me and CD went to Tampa and had a blast. So glad he is in my life to help me through and be there when I need him.  My family and friends are absolutely amazing! They leave me in awe on most days.  Over the Thanksgiving holiday, my extended family seems so genuinely happy for me and just so excited to see that I am finally about to be a mommy.

I am growing more and more every day.  I have notice a lot of physical changes, but embracing them all. And if I don't say so myself, I think I still look pretty dag on good ;-). 

I had a growth scan today and my little lady is right on target.  She measured at 2 pounds 12 ounces, which is in the 42 percentile.  So she is not too big or too small, but just right! That's mommy's little girl! She is very active in my belly which keeps me smiling. The ultrasound tech was trying to get some 3D shots for me and this little Diva put her hand in her face, like she was not quite ready to be photographed. LOL.. The tech said, Hey she said Mom I need a few more weeks to get more prettied up. We cracked up laughing. Life with my little baby has been so rewarding, I can't wait to see her little precious face.

I started purchasing things for her nursery and can't wait to see it come together. Crib, dressing table, wall decor all purchased.  Still need paint and other decor. I have been so overwhelmed with my pregnancy that I am so behind on other things. I have done no Christmas shopping, no blogging, and house work. I need to get rid of some things but i keep putting it off. Then not to mentions, I have been busy with work and Christmas parties.  I am going to be partied out when it is all over.

Well at the end of the day, Life is great and me and my little lady are healthy!!!!! YEAH!!!!

I pray all is well for all my other Pregnant Choice moms and those trying! Keep on believing!!!  I have a friend who will start her process to motherhood this month, so I am also sending love and blessings her way!  Way to go MW, so proud of you girl!!!

M.I.A....

I know.. I know.. I has been almost a month since I have blogged.. SHAME on me. But I have been so overwhelmed with the joys of pregnancy days seems to go by faster. 23w5d...

Well my little lady is moving quite a bit and I just love the feeling.  I remember the first time I felt her move, kind of startled me,  because I didn't expect to feel her so soon.  But she made sure I knew it was here.  My niece was home from college, so I called her. She was delighted as well.. :-)

I think my little girl likes music.  Whenever I am listening to music loud she moves all about, and has a good ole time. Or not.. LOL.. she could be saying Mommy, I care not listen to that.  I am going to go with she likes it.  Her mom likes music, so she has to get used to it being around all the time.

I have started talking to her, my family does too.  It is so special!  Everyone loves this little girl to pieces and they have not even seen her little precious face yet.  The love she is being shown is unbelievable some days and it really warms my heart.

This past weekend, me, my Mom, Sister and niece did my registries. Super exciting... BUT I did have a bit of anxiety.  No other to put down, no co-parent.  Made me a little sad, I didn't mention it or let it seem like it bothered me, but it did a little.  I guess these are the things I have to get used to.  My daughter will only have one parent.  It does seem as if these companies are making it a little less stressful for Choice Moms.  When registering they do not make you feel like Father is required. So that helped,  but I have always dreamed to be able to register a mother and a father for my child.  Oh well, such is life! Most days I am just as content with no Daddy. But then it does hit me randomly, WHY does my daughter have to not have a father.  Why did her Mom's life turn this way.  She is so special to me already, that I just want the best for her and I have always thought Mom and Dad was what was best.  I guess I have to show her and the world that Mom and extended family is enough!  Not going to say it doesn't make me long for a committed relationship with a man, because it does.  I just keep remembering this is God's plan for me and my babies life! And thank HIM for it!

My pregnancy has been truly amazing.  Never did have morning sickness, how awesome is that :-). She has been such a good girl.  I go in 2 weeks for my glucose test... What fun.. LOL Praying for the very best outcome!!! Well I am going to try to do much better with this!!!

To my Little Girl: HEY I can stop saying future child.. I know it is a girl :-).  You have been such a blessing to me already.  I am already learning so much about myself, just having you here with me every day. I know our lives is not may not be like the you make friends and we do not have Daddy at home.  But like I will tell you every day, you are special, different, unique.  So, while there may be days you wish you were like everyone else, thank God that you have the loving family you have been blessed with.  And there may be no biologically Dad around.  You have so many more people to love you. Your uncle, your aunts, your cousins, your Nanny, me and most important Jesus! When you do not feel I understand God will never leave nor forsake you. NEVER.. So know you are never alone! Love you to pieces!!!

She is still a She!!!

I had an appointment yesterday to recheck my little girls heart and spine. Which are both great :-).  Well while I was there, I said can you make sure she is still a girl.. LOL.. I know crazy right.  The technician died laughing at me.  They already think I a part time comedienne.  Well hey before I go Pink and purple crazy I wanted to be extra sure!

The appointment was fast and no issues.. YEAH!!!

I went on my first baby window shop over the weekend, WOW all the things they have. I mean I have helped raise my nieces and nephews but there are so many new gadgets. It was fun, but a tab bit overwhelming as well. But going to take it one day at a time.

My sister is about to drive me absolutely crazy, she is so happy about this little girl that she is becoming a pain in my A**.. LOL.. I love her for loving me and my baby so much but Lord knows I want to strangle her sometimes.  I love having all the support, but I feel it is going to be a bit overwhelming as time passes. This child is going to have 1 too many mommies an that is going to irritate me. The help will be great, but all the advice after awhile can become a bit frustrating.  I am going to take it in stride for now and just put them in check when I need to.  I am so grateful they are happy, but the need to let me also have the joy of being pregnant and being a Mommy.  Like my sister was fussing because I bought the baby some bibs. REALLY bibs.. Give me a break, I know I have a lot of friends and family, but they are NOT going to buy me everything i need. Nor do I expect them too. I have not been shopping and buying a bunch of things, so leave me alone if I want to buy some dag on bibs, for crying out loud! Gotta love family! They have been a blessing, but man have they also been over the TOP!

I  have started looking in to themes for the nursery. OMG there is so much out there, almost too much! Well it will all come together and my Little Princess will have a fabulous room, that she probably will spend very little time in.. LOL but oh well Mommy wants one.